Lindsay and Bryan's Story: Adoption

Read Lindsay and Bryan’s Story to see how it all began!

Read Lindsay and Bryan's Story: Foster Care to learn about their care for kids in foster care, and support for the children's birth family.

PCHAS contacted Bryan and Lindsay about a unique situation as school wound down. A new mom reached out to the agency soon after giving birth. She did not feel able to care for her daughter and asked the agency for help. When birth families reach out, PCHAS can offer a private foster care placement to ensure a child's safety. Child Protective Services (CPS) is not involved, but a verified foster family is required to meet all the state rules. Lindsay and Bryan agreed to care for the 4-day-old little girl up until the time they were due to leave on their trip.

While the baby was in foster care, a PCHAS social worker worked with the mother. Even though she reached out to the agency asking for help with an adoptive placement, we never assume that anyone is ready for such a life-altering decision without proper support and counseling. We try to give women in these circumstances as much time as possible to explore their feelings, options, and plans. We love adoption and celebrate the families created through adoption, but only after considering alternatives and ensuring the birth mother feels confident in her decision. With ample time and counseling, it was clear the young woman was ready to continue with adoptive placement.

Now, the agency needed to find an adoptive family for the little one. Because the baby was doing so well, PCHAS asked Bryan and Lindsay if they would like to be considered. They were ecstatic, but it was only a few days until they were supposed to leave on their big trip, and Bryan also remembered that they would have to pay adoption fees because this was not a CPS case. PCHAS has a very reasonable fee structure for these situations, but it was still far outside their family’s single-income educator budget.

That night, the family attended a swim party. Bryan pulled their pastor aside and shared about the situation. It was incredibly confusing: they already loved this little girl so much, but the finances and timing felt impossible. Their pastor thought the church could offer some help. He encouraged Bryan and Lindsay to pray and discuss everything they had to consider. They told their sons about the opportunity the next day, and the boys quickly started thinking of things they would sacrifice and even offered up the trip they had all been looking forward to.

On Sunday, Bryan told the pastor they wanted to proceed. Their pastor hoped the church would commit 50% of the cost of the adoption and met with the church’s financial leadership team later that day. The team raised the bar and decided to take up an offering, agreeing to cover the difference if it did not cover 100% of the adoption expenses. Bryan said, “After a couple of days, the church had to cut off the giving because it had exceeded the amount needed to cover all of our costs.” Bryan and Lindsay were humbled and overwhelmed.

With the funding secured, PCHAS was able to consider Bryan and Lindsay for placement and presented the family (along with others) to the child’s birth mother.  She was really pleased that Linday and Bryan were open to adopting and said it felt right to her to place her daughter with the family she was already bonding with. On Wednesday, they learned that she officially chose their family to adopt her baby.

When Lindsay called to tell Byran the good news, he was ecstatic. One of his sons was on his campus, so he ran up to tell him the good news. His teacher is an adoptive mom, and she was elated and tearful. Their friends and family threw a huge baby shower to officially welcome their little girl, Fern, to the family and blessed Lindsay and Bryan with enough diapers to last the entire first year.

“Everybody loves Fern. She’s always the center of attention,” shared Lindsay. Everyone doting on one family member can sometimes cause tension, but Lindsay says adding Fern to their family has had the opposite effect and brought out the best in their boys. “As kids get older, they spend more time doing their own things. Our boys seem to be more drawn into what’s going on for the family, and our adoption has really brought us all even closer together as a family.” To make it even sweeter, Rylee-Rae and Daniel are getting to be a regular part of Fern’s life, too. They see her as a younger sister and enjoy helping take care of her. She looks up to them and wants to do what the bigger kids are doing. It’s an unexpected outcome that is even better than Bryan and Lindsay could have imagined.

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Lindsay and Bryan’s Advice for Future Adoptive and Foster Families

If you have ever thought about adopting or fostering, PCHAS offers weekly Online Info Sessions. They are a great way to learn how it all works. As Bryan and Lindsay said, “You’re not risking anything by going to an informational meeting!” CLICK HERE to sign up for an Online Info Session, or contact a Foster Care & Adoption Guide to learn more.

If you or someone you know is experiencing an unintended pregnancy, we offer free, non-judgmental counseling to explore the complexities of parenting and making an adoption plan. Call (713) 522-2800 for info. 

*Information about children in foster care and their families is confidential. We celebrate Kristi’s success and are grateful for her permission to share her story to help PCHAS find more safe, loving families who will partner with birth families with compassion and respect.