Everyone Has a Role

Peter and his siblings were adopted from foster care when he was seven. He was grateful that he was adopted with his siblings and he grew up knowing he wanted to offer kids the same opportunity. It’s only fitting that Peter would marry Sharon, a woman who shared his compassion for children and commitment to taking on the role of foster and adoptive parents someday.

So when Peter and Sharon moved to Wichita Falls and became close friends with a couple that was fostering, they knew it was a clear sign. They worked hard to complete the requirements so that they could finally take on this role they had long hoped for. Over the next several years with PCHAS, they cared for more than fifteen children and helped their birth families work toward reunification.

Peter and Sharon excelled in this role and worked hard to model a healthy family life for children and their birth families. Sharon was able to mentor for some of the mothers and recalled one instance where a mom wasn’t sure how to secure a car seat. Fearing she’d be judged negatively by CPS staff, she reached out to Sharon. Sharon knew her role was to keep kids safe and keep them at the center of every decision. She knew that was the role of birth families, too, so she was glad for the chance to help another mom give her very best for a kid they both loved.

They also knew that reunification wasn’t always possible. They trusted that, in time, there would be a need and they would adopt. As opportunities became reality, the family’s first two adoptions were of single children. Then, as they were preparing to adopt a third (single) child last year, they were presented with the opportunity to also adopt his older brother and sister. Peter and Sharon said “Yes!” without hesitation. Becoming the adoptive family for siblings so that they could stay together was an important role to Peter and the family was excited to finalize their adoption in March.

With three girls and five boys between four and twenty years old, the family’s home is full. Some children joined their family through birth and some were welcomed through adoption, but in their home, everyone shares a common role: family. 

And like any family, life can be stressful. During a particularly trying season, Sharon decided that the family needed to go camping. Their past attempts hadn’t been successful, but this time was different and the family fell in love with the outdoors. In their training classes at PCHAS, they learned a lot about attachment and connection. As the family began camping more frequently, they could actually feel those bonds growing deeper. The family even set and accomplished a goal to visit every State Park in Texas. Texas Parks & Wildlife documented their incredible story.

Camping has been great for the family, and Peter and Sharon believe their clarity about roles plays a big part. “Mom and Dad can’t do everything,” the couple said, noting that their kids get to experience the feeling of accomplishment when they try something new.

Peter and Sharon say that foster care and adoption is similar to camping. They set out with a goal to be family for children who need one, but they wouldn’t have been successful without friends who provided respite care and babysitting, meals, prayer and encouragement. Peter and Sharon needed a village of support in order to thrive. Everyone in their village had a role and every role was important because it helped them offer their very best as foster parents. In turn, they were better able to help birth families complete steps toward reunification and ensure permanency for five of their children through adoption.

So what advice would Peter and Sharon give? Everyone has a role. Know your role, know that it may be hard, and know in your heart that you’ll never give up.

More than 3,000 Texas children are eligible for adoption, and about 70% having siblings and need a family that will adopt them, together. If you’re curious about the role of a foster or adoptive parent, PCHAS foster care and adoption guides are available to ensure you get the honest answers you deserve. Email fosteradopt@pchas.org, call 281-324-0544 or join an online info session.