Connecting for Hope

“Mom, I really feel like our family is changing.” Thirteen-year-old Natalie stated this on day three of our Connect for Hope Camp.

This summer PCHAS held its fourth Connect for Hope TBRI© camp. It was a week of long yet rewarding days serving children affected by childhood trauma and the families that love them. Although we have always known the power of relationship, through our collaboration with the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development (KPICD) out of Texas Christian University, we are now learning much more about seeing the need behind a behavior and meeting that need.

The principles of TBRI© (Trust Based Relational Intervention), which developed out of the Karyn Purvis Institute, give us tools on how to best meet the needs of kids from hard places. Most importantly, they help us hold up a mirror to show these kiddos how precious and amazing they are—that they are made in His vision and just how much we delight in them.

Sarah Mercado, Training Specialist for the KPICD and a volunteer at camp stated, “It is overwhelming watching parents go from a place of anger and hopelessness to getting the first real hug in years from their child. Connect for Hope isn’t just about giving kids a safe place to heal. It’s also about giving parents a safe place to be vulnerable, share their hurts with others in the same fight and begin their healing.”

The kids are matched with a buddy who is there to develop a deep, meaningful connection. They are constantly working on building trust and creating safety. Our kids need to feel safe, like, deep-in-their-bones safe. Once they feel safe, kids grow leaps and bounds in relationship, trust, distinguishing threat versus safety, empathy, regulation and so much more. Sara Craig, PCHAS director of development and a camp buddy, said this about the kids we serve: “Their incredible courage to work through their fears and learn to connect with others, in spite of all the hurt, inspired me."

PCHAS volunteer and buddy Amy Marks said of her experience, “We saw kids start to use their voices to negotiate their needs instead of having melt-downs, accept a ‘no’ when they don't get their way, and learn to share their emotions and hurts with safe adults. Camp itself is just a few days, but it has a lasting impact on these kids and families.”

Camp is a highly structured yet highly nurturing time for both children and adults. Caregivers often come to camp at the end of their rope, needing connection and hope just as much as the kids. Our camp provides just that.

Crissy Sykes, one of the parents who attended camp, said, “I came hesitant and broken, and you provided a judgement-free zone for me to express my fears…. I am convinced that this past week, you were the hands, feet and voice of Jesus in our lives. We were in need and you met us there. We left with hope for our future. Thanks for loving me and my girls.”

She further stated, “I felt like our world was falling apart. Today I feel the struggle but know that we are a family. We will do the best we can to keep the promise we made at adoption and provide them the foundation they need to be successful.”

When our babies have been hurt, we hurt with them. And the families that care and love for these babies hurt to the bone for their kids. During camp, these families did hard, reflective work so that they can be the best trauma-informed parents to their children. With insights, they are able to not only see their child’s needs when they don’t have words to voice them, but also meet those needs with patience, love and compassion. Hope is hard work, but so worth it.

I’m thankful for an agency that is truly about serving like Jesus and loving kids and families well. I’m thankful for an awesome team that gave of their precious time and energy. Many PCHAS staff dedicated their personal time to be a part of camp because they so passionately believe in the mission of TBRI©. But mostly, I’m thankful for these kids—their light shines so bright.

Leah Gilliam, LMSW, LCPAA

Connect for Hope Camp Director

Director, Foster Care and Adoption DFW/Waxahachie